Emotional eating is stress eating. If you’re a woman who is overweight and struggling with overeating, food obsession, cravings, and hating your body, then there’s a good chance that you have binged in response to stress and overwhelm. We get bombarded by life when we give in to the disease to please.

As a woman who has struggled with secret eating and binging for a large part of my life, I’ve learned to recognize that my desire to overeat often arises from my need to be a people pleaser.

As a professional coach and Master Practitioner of Neuro Linguistic Programmng, I’ve learned that what you say doesn’t matter to me, what really matters is what I tell myself. If I believe that you are more important than me or that my feelings are not valid and in order for me to be at peace, I have to please you, then I will let you walk all over me. I used to do that all the time.

Several years ago I was a Girl Scout Leader for a troop of Brownies. I was the new leader in the group and as a result I was very eager to please and wanted everyone to like me and be my friend. Each month all the leaders were gathered together to discuss news and events. In a meeting during the holidays, my

Division Leader, Laurie asked for volunteers to bake 5 dozen cookies for an upcoming holiday party. No one raised their hand.

Laurie then proceeded to pick several women out of the group and ask them individually if they would be willing to help. They each declined. She paused a moment and looked around the room. Her piercing blue eyes locked on mine and she stared me down for what seemed like an eternity. Then with a disapproving glare and a sarcastic tone, she asked if I could find the time to help out the girls.

Every muscle in my body clenched. I felt so intimidated. I wanted the floor to open up and swallow me. I just knew that I couldn’t say “No” and disappoint everyone and I really wanted to be considered a team player. I could feel my body screaming “No” but the words, “Yes” tumbled out of my mouth.

That evening while baking those holiday cookies, I fell headfirst into a binge.

Now many years after finally giving up dieting and seeing food for what it is, just food, I realize that I’ve spent years binging on food when what I really wanted to do is to just say, “No” Whenever I find myself eating more than I want to, I ask myself these questions:

What’s happening?

How am I feeling?

How have I overcommitted myself?

If you’re feeling resentment, anger or guilt or have trouble saying, “No,”, these are all indicators that some part of your life is out of balance. Before you resort to binging, consider the benefits of joining a group of women devoted to supporting you to reclaim power over food and your life. If you’re a woman, it might be a perfect time to see if my Juicy Woman Support forum is right for you.

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