When you lose sight of your routine that keeps you grounded, don’t add insult to injury and beat yourself up, just go back to doing what works.
As I looked into my bathroom mirror this morning, I realized that whenever I go several days, weeks or heaven forbid months without the benefit of what I know to be my grounding regimen, I always get into trouble and end up paying a very high price.
Being a mom of two, a wife, a community actionist and home based business owner, there’s always about a million things to think about and do each day. It’s easy to get taken off of your own list of priorities. It starts out innocently enough, where one day I get so busy that it seems impossible to take those 20 minutes that morning and sit quietly, pondering nothing, breathing or just clearing my mind that day.
Inevitably I find that devastatingly misguided decision leads to making it easier for me to forget to do other things that I would normally do for myself, like choosing foods that make me feel good from the inside out, speaking up and saying what’s on my mind and challenging my fearful and negative thoughts.
I also start cutting myself off at the knees by avoiding things that show evidence of self love, like getting out and walking in the sunshine, just for the fun of it, eating more fruits and veggies, reconnecting with my body and touching my stomach and stroking my legs more often to tap into greater wells of self compassion. That helps me to remember that any excess weight on my body is just a reminder that there’s still a vulnerable little girl in me living beneath those layers of insulation and excess pounds of pain. And the more gentle and loving I can be towards her each day, the more safe she feels to peel back the layers of fat and come out of hiding.When I lose myself in the flurry of activity and deny my self care, those are also the times when I find myself hating the image that stands before me in the mirror and the constantly on guard critic inside of me notices that it sees a fatter, uglier and stupider version of me standing before it.
I can’t seem to do anything right when I fall into this loop. I find myself getting into silly arguments, becoming insecure and fighting more of my own demons. The answer for me has become more obvious as I’ve taken time and studied the effects of consistent stress relief and how it changes my perspective.
There used to be a time when I would beat up on myself because I knew that I wasn’t doing what I ‘should.’ I swore that was evidence of falling off track, losing my way and just plain screwing everything up. The result of that was that I felt so guilty and frustrated with myself that I became paralyzed to do anything more than just eat in a vain attempt to lift my spirits.
Now I know that getting to the destination is not as important as enjoying the journey. I will get thinner but unlike my dieting days, I’m in no rush, because I’ve learned to like myself more no matter what size I wear. Now I realize that all my ‘mistakes, binges, goofs, screw ups and ‘failures’ are all important and essential to my success. As the late Heath Ledger’s joker says in the film, Batman: The Dark Knight, “It’s all part of the plan.” Change is a process and there is no failure, only feedback.
As soon as I notice that I’ve fallen into a slump, I pick myself up, dust myself off and get back in the game and start over again. Taking time for yourself and spending more time resting and rejuvenating is one of the most essential things that you can do to nourish your body from the inside out. It’s the best thing I know to tame your screaming meanie self talk. How about you? What do you do when you notice that you’re ‘shoulding’ on yourself? Let’s talk about that tonight. What do you say?
Just a quick reminder of the call this evening at 7:00 p.m. I’m giving you a free opportunity to ask me any questions you have about how to make peace with food and friends with your body.
I hope that you can join me. Click below for all the info:
don’t give up, New Year, Andrea Amador, The Juicy Woman, lose weight, body image,